Better Than One

How are you doing?  “I’m drowinng!”, “I want to walk away and not come back.”  I feel like I have the whole world on my back.”  “I am fried – I have no enthusiasm.”  “I feel like I don’t want to get out of bed.”  These responses often describe the feelings, emotions, and desperation of a pastor or staff member who is running on fumes.  That person may be verbal about their situation, but most of the time they are quiet or may not even realize the state of their own psyche and health.  

Wayne Cordeiro, senior pastor of New Hope Christian Fellowship in Honolulu, Hawaii, has written a new book entitled “Leading On Empty:  Refilling Your Tank and Renewing Your Passion.”  Wayne relates the incident that led to the title this way, ”It was a balmy California evening.  I had gone for a jog before I was to speak at a leadership conference.  I still can’t recall how I got there, but I found myself sitting on a curb weeping uncontrollably.  I couldn’t tell if it took place suddenly or gradually but I knew something had broken inside.  I remember lifting my trembling hands and asking out loud, ‘What in the world is happening to me?’

Customer reviews about the book include:  practical, open, encouraging, realistic, transparent, hopeful, and engaging.

“Leading on Empty” is a good book study for church staff.  All ages need to be aware of burnout, exhausation, depression, and going beyond your limits.  To stay sharp and effective in ministry, ministers need to care for themselves as they care for the congregation.  A minister’s family and church family need a rested, renewed, balanced, and healthy father and leader.

Chapter titles are:

1.  When the Needle Points to Empty

2.  Forced to failure

3.  Power Perfected in Weakness

4.  Early Warning Signs

5.  Solitary Refinement

6.  Finding the Still Waters

7.  The new Perspective

8.  Seven Lessions Hard-Learned

9.  Finding the Way Back Home

10.  The Intentional Life

11.  Finding solitude in Sabbaticals

Wayne Cordiero’s incident led him to a three-year odyssey that would change his lifestyle, values, goals, and even adjust his callling.  Take time to care for yourself!   

“Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you.” (1 Peter 5:7)      

In my travels and conversations across our state, it is obvious there are many churches without pastors.  Several reasons can be cited for the number of vacancies including a misfit of pastor and church, failure of churches to properly take care of their pastors needs, the failure of some pastors to properly take care of the spiritual needs of their congregations, and at times a general restlessness among both pastors and churches.   Several Pastor Search Committees call on me for help and also names of potential pastors.  But perhaps the best help comes while a church still has a pastor.  What can you do to encourage your pastor right now?

I was thumbing through a little book the other day entitled “It Only Hurts On Monday.”  The book gives five things church members can do for their pastor in any size church.

1.  Stop comparing the pastor’s job to yours.

2.  Affirm the value of your pastor’s work.

3.  Offer your assistance.

4.  Boost his dreams and hopes for the church. 

5.  Start a Pastor’s Prayer Team.

Do you want to keep your pastor and make him a better pastor, try these five ways of encouragement and see what happens.  

As I was driving one day, I saw a large sign in the church yard that said, “We Love Children.”  It grabbed my attention, and I thought if I lived nearby, I would like to check out this church because of the sign.  If you put a sign like this in your church yard, be sure to back it up with actions that say, “We Love Children.”  People should be warm and friendly to children as they come into the building.  Be ready for guests – clean, equipped, and staffed. Involve older adults to be “grandparents” to younger adults and children.  Be intentional in inviting young families to come to church.

 In addition to Sunday School, RA’s, GA’s, TeamKid, Bible Drill,  Awana,  and music programs, good children’s ministries often include other uniquely designed  programs.  Sherman Baptist Church with David Tucker as pastor brings in nearly 80 children on vans from area schools for an after school program on Tuesdays.  The children do their homework and participate in Bible Drill.  As parents pick up the children, church workers  meet them and establish relationships with the family.  The church family prays individually for each child and family.  Monthly on Fridays, Sherman BC has successfully offered LEGO Night with 35 or more children and families coming.  This is a fun and effective way to reach into the community. Summertime continues to offer opportunities to connect with children through Vacation Bible School and camps.

Do We Love Children?  “Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me, and do not hinder them, for the kingdom of heaven belongs to such as these.” (Matthew 19:14)

Fear is a word often used as our church looks at the financial market, layoff of workers, businesses closing, and giving.  I was watching an older movie “Patch Adams” with Robin Williams.  Early in the movie Robin Williams admits himself into a mental hospital because he is so depressed and feels like a complete loser.  He immediately meets an old, eccentric, millionaire who asks him how many fingers he is holding up.  Robin looks and tells him “four”.  The old man calls him crazy and walks away.  Robin Williams is intrigued with this old man. One night he finds him doing math equations on the wall that only a brilliant person could understand.  As he patches a leaking coffee cup for the old man, Robin wants to know about those four fingers .   The old man again asks Robin how many fingers  he sees, and he replies “four”.  “No” said the old man.  “Look again.  Look beyond the fingers.  Look at me.”  When Robin looked at the old man’s face and not his fingers, he surprisingly saw eight fingers.   The obvious lesson was– Don’t look at the problem (four fingers), but look beyond the problem to the answer.  Many today are presently consumed with financial problems and fail to look beyond them to the answer–Jesus. 

The church is here for such a time as this! (Esther 4:14)

Dennis Bickers in his Bivocational Ministries blog encourages us to not miss this window of opportunity “to share God’s hope and encouragement to a people whose lives have been turned upside-down.  The message of the media and culture is gloom and doom; the message of the church should be one of hope and encouragement as we point people to Jesus Christ.”

At KBC Deacon’s Retreat in Lexington, Ken Hemphill, SBC National Strategist for Empowering Kingdom Growth. said, “Fear should become Faith, Panic should become Passion, and Timidity should become Tenacity”.  The church must stay positive and be proactive not reactive.  Pray, listen, and hear what God has in store for you!